The Internet Is, In Fact, For Porn, Apparently*

So, I finally got myself hooked up with Google Analytics, purely so that I could do one of those funny posts where you list the web searches that brought people to your site and then write pithy remarks about them.

I fully admit I don't know how to fully make use of all these pretty pie charts that I now have access to, but I figured out how to get the keyword search report. Sadly, so far, I don't have a whole lot to go off of. There are a couple related to birth stories ("having contractions videos," "homebirth story," and my favorite, "hypnobirthing and hippies," which I'm pretty sure is redundant). Someone found me by searching for "creepoid," which is a word I thought I made up.

But the rest?

"blogspot xxx amateur"

"enematime"

"i jerk myself amateur video"


So, um, not only are people coming here for porn, they're coming here for awkward, novice porn. Swell.




*This blog title refers to the song "The Internet is For Porn" from Avenue Q. If you're familiar with the show, you'll appreciate this little story: my mom saw the show in NY on a business trip and enjoyed it. As she would do with any musical she enjoyed, she promptly bought the soundtrack. Later she told me about how she had it on the stereo on a bright spring day, with the windows and doors open, only to realize that she hadn't really paid close attention to many of the (hilariously dirty) lyrics until she found herself blaring lines like, "Me grab my dick/and point and click" to the sleepy suburbs.