There's an inside joke/running gag/motto in improv theatre: "Bigger, faster, funnier!" Instructors have been known to shout it out in the middle of a dragging scene. Which is ironic, really, because there's nothing to make you be less funny, less free, less open and willing to take risks than, say, someone shouting at you to be BETTER, DAMMIT!!
Knowing that, I'm already second-guessing my decision to start blogging during NaBloPoMo, because I want each and every post I write to be brilliant and funny and perfectly articulated. But posting daily (with a full-time job and a full-time baby) isn't going to allow me to edit myself (read: obsessively rewrite) to the extent to which I am accustomed. So I will keep floundering, hearing in my mind, "Bigger, faster, funnier!" Which is, of course, not the intent of NaBlo...etc. In fact, I like that they point out that we're going for quantity, not quality. That's the kind of standard I can meet.
Last night I was IMing with a friend, confessing that I'd eaten entirely too much Halloween candy. She absolved me of all guilt, pointing out, "It's not meth." And we decided that this was the perfect response for all kinds of justification. She decided to order food rather than eat some of the perfectly good food in her kitchen. Ordered unnecessary takeout? Hey, it's not meth. Spending too much time dicking around on Facebook? Hey, it's not meth. Forget to send your grandmother a card at her new assisted-living facility, even though your aunt specifically told you that Grandma "is afraid no-one will know where she's living"? Hey, IT'S NOT METH. See? It really is a useful catch-all for any behavior you might need to excuse.
So that's what I shall cling to as I write what are likely to be 30 posts that fall short of my totally reasonable expectation of perfect. My writing may be haphazard, poorly planned, boring, hopelessly derivative, but, hey, it's not meth.
Tune in tomorrow for actual things! About me! That aren't all weird and meta about blogging!
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